Men Can Stop Violence

"If you step on my foot, you need to get off my foot. If you step on my foot without meaning to, you..."

Wed, 06 Mar 2013 17:27:31 -0500

“

If you step on my foot, you need to get off my foot.

If you step on my foot without meaning to, you need to get off my foot.

If you step on my foot without realizing it, you need to get off my foot.

If everyone in your culture steps on feet, your culture is horrible, and you need to get off my foot.

If you have foot-stepping disease, and it makes you unaware you’re stepping on feet, you need to get off my foot. If an event has rules designed to keep people from stepping on feet, you need to follow them. If you think that even with the rules, you won’t be able to avoid stepping on people’s feet, absent yourself from the event until you work something out.

If you’re a serial foot-stepper, and you feel you’re entitled to step on people’s feet because you’re just that awesome and they’re not really people anyway, you’re a bad person and you don’t get to use any of those excuses, limited as they are. And moreover, you need to get off my foot.

See, that’s why I don’t get the focus on classifying harassers and figuring out their motives. The victims are just as harassed either way.

”

- Hershele Ostropoler, in a comment on John Scalzi’s blog post, “Readercon, Harassment, Etc.”

The comment is in reference to sexual harassment that occurred at the Readercon convention and the subsequent defense of the situation by some members of fandom and the Readercon Board.

It’s also applicable to other situations where someone claims their intentions were pure and they didn’t mean to do something sexist/racist/heterosexist/abelist, etc. Even if you did not mean to step on someone’s foot—you did.

(via racebending)

knowhomo: LGBTQ* Allies and Individuals We Are Amazed...

Wed, 06 Mar 2013 13:07:47 -0500

knowhomo:

LGBTQ* Allies and Individuals We Are Amazed By

Brothers of Phi Alpha Tau at Emerson College

(who have been campaigning to pay for a fellow brother’s top surgery)

Want to contribute? IndieGoGo HERE

Want to know more? Out.com Article HERE

My name is Karmbir Chima, but I go by KC because it is just a...

Wed, 09 Jan 2013 13:15:42 -0500

My name is Karmbir Chima, but I go by KC because it is just a lot easier for everyone to say. I was born in Punjab, India and moved to the country when I was a few months old. I am 26 years old living in San Francisco. I am about to finish up 2 degrees, a B.S. in Biochem and a B.A. in Chem. No, I am not becoming a doctor. The world has enough Indian doctors. I am active member of my fraternity, Phi Kappa Tau. This is my second time I am participating in CockTales and I am proud to be able to share my experiences with all of the guests.

Joseph Magsaysay, 17 year old, poet, artist, musician from...

Tue, 08 Jan 2013 19:45:38 -0500

Joseph Magsaysay, 17 year old, poet, artist, musician from ‘P.I’, ‘SF, and South San Francisco. I have a very curious/creative mind. I like observing, and seeing the seeds I sow into success. My success is defined by happiness and balance.

Yosimar Reyes, a Two-Spirit Poet/Activist Based out of San...

Tue, 08 Jan 2013 16:30:38 -0500

Yosimar Reyes, a Two-Spirit Poet/Activist Based out of San Jose,CA. He holds the title for the 2005 as well as the 2006 South Bay teen Grand SLAM Champion, has been featured in the Documentary 2nd Verse: the Rebirth of Poetry. (2ndversefilm.com) And published in Mariposas: A Modern Anthology of Queer Latino Poetry (Floricanto Press) His words have open up concerts for Carlos Santana in his latest endeavor Architects of a New Dawn (Aoand.com)

Yosimar is currently touring his self-published chapbook For Colored Boys Who speaks softly…

Abel R. Gomez is a student, writer, community organizer, and...

Tue, 08 Jan 2013 13:15:38 -0500

Abel R. Gomez is a student, writer, community organizer, and ritualist. He has worked with several organizations on campus including La Raza, the Jumpstart club, the Pride Committee, and with a group of student volunteers, organized Queer Yo’ Mind, the first queer leadership conference at SFSU in over thirty years. In recent years, his community work has focused on the intersectionality of queer identity, social justice, and earth-based spirituality. Abel believes deeply in the potential each of us has to step into the fullness of our humanity to transform our lives and bring more beauty and power into the world. He is a junior studying Philosophy and Religion and was recently elected Representative at Large in the Associated Students, Inc. board for the 2012-2013 term

Joseph Greenwell is originally from rural Kentucky and now calls...

Mon, 07 Jan 2013 19:45:41 -0500

Joseph Greenwell is originally from rural Kentucky and now calls San Francisco home. He received his Bachelors in Music from Vanderbilt University and Masters in Education from Peabody College, Vanderbilt. He has worked in Student Activities at Colgate University and Stanford University prior to joining SF State in 2005. He served as the Director of LEAD, Interim Associate Vice President for Student Affairs, and Associate Dean of Students. Joseph currently serves as Dean of Students.

Jonny Briz is a Medical Assistant who was inspired by other...

Mon, 07 Jan 2013 16:30:36 -0500

Jonny Briz is a Medical Assistant who was inspired by other family members to get involved in the medical field. In his leisure time, Jonny enjoys spending time with friends and family, playing recreational sports, and playing music. Jonny has recently been crossing paths with other individuals involved with music and has been inspired and motivated to further his musical aspirations. One of Jonny’s biggest inspiration and musician is Bob Marley, as he also believes in the notion that music truly can cure hate and bring people together in a positive light.

After a number of years performing this will be Nikki’s...

Mon, 07 Jan 2013 13:15:28 -0500

After a number of years performing this will be Nikki’s return to the stage after receiving her BA last May. Communication and IT Consultant by day by Nikki is now focusing her efforts on her slam and stand up. It has been an honor to be the only female-identified woman to be performing in Cocktales two years in a row and will be performing an original slam poetry piece.

Phoenix performing at Cocktales 2012

Sun, 06 Jan 2013 19:45:40 -0500

Phoenix performing at Cocktales 2012

Tyler Potts-Cornfield SF State alumni Tyler Potts-Cornfield is...

Sun, 06 Jan 2013 16:30:52 -0500

Tyler Potts-Cornfield

SF State alumni Tyler Potts-Cornfield is a writer, folk singer and occasional freestyle rapper. They say to write what you know, so he’s released two albums of awkwardly confessional songs about his experiences with lovers and friends around the world. You can find evidence of these on YouTube under his aliases Wes Leslie and Thin Tizzy.

Aristel is a producer, emcee, poet, and educator born and raised...

Sun, 06 Jan 2013 13:15:33 -0500

Aristel is a producer, emcee, poet, and educator born and raised in the Excelsior district of San Francisco. He has worked closely with the Filipino American community in San Francisco for the past 7 years. Through his art and teaching, he seeks to engage people in critical and humanizing dialogue and action. You can also learn more about his music at aristyles.bandcamp.com

Patrick Ohslund is a professional spoken word artist and poetry...

Sat, 05 Jan 2013 19:45:32 -0500

Patrick Ohslund is a professional spoken word artist and poetry workshop
facilitator. This is his fourth year performing in Cocktales, he has as
well been exhibited in UCSF’s Men’s Story Project. Currently he is the
Executive Director of The Voice of a Generation Present’s: Digital
Storytelling and recently he was the featured artist at the Guatemala City
Poetry Slam and has a teddy bear by the name of Tris who is his personal
mentor.

Michael Simon Michael Simon is an East Bay native and...

Sat, 05 Jan 2013 16:30:47 -0500

Michael Simon

Michael Simon is an East Bay native and classically trained musician who recently entered the realm of song writing. Using soulful melodies as a vehicle, his lyrics express, explore, and deconstruct his experiences as a queer person of color. Despite being a newcomer to the game, Michael has already performed in a number of venues including: “Love Through Deviant Ears” at La Peña Cultural Center in Berkeley, “Ignite the Flame”, at the Bayanihan Community Center in SF, the 2011 Western Regional LGBTQIA Conference, and most recently at the Western Regional QPOCC Conference in Northridge.

Michael distinguishes himself from today’s flock of YouTube cover singers by performing completely original work. And in an era where misogynistic lyrics and overproduced house beats have become the norm, Michael seeks to change up the narrative by bringing chivalry and sophistication back. Keep your ears open and your eyes on the lookout for his EP, which is slated to drop later this year.

John Kusaba Guided by the articulation of his father, and of a...

Sat, 05 Jan 2013 13:15:32 -0500

John Kusaba

Guided by the articulation of his father, and of a golden heart from his mother, John, Jay, or JD, admits that this circus that we call life, and the band-aids and ladders rummaged in between, will be the relaxed canvas for his arts and crafts and sprinkles of muse. Wordsmithing, is his version of science, philosophy and art, all rolled into a dutch crunch roll. John, has performed at local venues such as the Capoeira Arts Café, Club Galia, Black Box Theatre, and at the Bill Graham Civic Auditorium. He relents, “BigUps to all who trekked here this evening… where tonight, we enter storytelling… and exit with a refreshed version and light to just be.” Word.

Ismael and Jeffrey introducing the 4th annual CockTales event...

Sat, 05 Jan 2013 03:32:17 -0500

Ismael and Jeffrey introducing the 4th annual CockTales event with our theme for this year: Fathers and Sons.

Stay tuned, we are uploading all of the Cocktales 2012 performances in the upcoming week!

gentlydropthebass: “Women can’t go out in skimpy clothing and be surprised when they’re raped!...

Sat, 05 Jan 2013 02:56:29 -0500

gentlydropthebass:

“Women can’t go out in skimpy clothing and be surprised when they’re raped! That’s like leaving your front door open and being surprised when you’re robbed!”

you’re comparing property to a human being

you’re comparing property to a human being

you’re comparing property to a human being

you’re comparing property to a human being

When someone tells you “you run like a girl,” take...

Thu, 08 Nov 2012 16:25:29 -0500

When someone tells you “you run like a girl,” take it as a compliment!! This girl is all about awesomeness.

Men's Summit - Washington, DC

Thu, 08 Nov 2012 12:05:00 -0500

I recently attended the Healthy Masculinity Summit a few weeks ago which is a two-year project of Men Can Stop Rape, National Resource Center on Domestic Violence, Men Stopping Violence, Coach for America, Women of Color Network, and A CALL TO MEN. It was truly an inspiring experience in continuing the conversation about men’s role in addressing violence against women and men. Several hundred like-minded conscious individuals converged in DC to share their wealth of information about building a healthier masculinity.

I was able to attend several workshops on how to engage healthy masculinity in sports facilitated by Joe Ehrmann, a former National Football League defensive lineman, and now an inspirational, dynamic speaker and seminar leader who works with corporate, civic and community organizations and associations to promote growth, teamwork, effectiveness and individual responsibility. I think one of the greatest lessons I learned from his talk was the idea that boys AND men need to have the space and support to be able to have the capacity to love and be loved. Secondly, he noted that humans as a species have a responsibility to give back to humanity thereby building empathy in men. These values Joe spoke about is important in incorporating everyone’s lives but more importantly and specially for coaches. He stated that coaches should carry the values of empathy, kindness, service to others to continue to create and make an impact in young male athlete’s lives. Rather coaching in a transactional form where the coaches only intent is to win at all cost, Joe contends that coaches should be more transformational in their attempt to coach young men. What I believe Joe meant was to actually transform men beyond the field of sports but to also support them as they use sports as a learning tool for life outside of sports. As we all know sports is so much a part of American society and for many sports serves as a religion where individuals’ fundamental belief system is created and practiced. Joe asserts that coaches have an important role in not only training young men in the field but also coaching them holistically both physically and emotionally.

I was highly moved by his statement because it brought back for me the idea that we are all human beings with all of these character and emotional traits and yet for men it has become impossible to provide a space for us as men to feel loved or show emotion. Our gendered roles as men have been so heavily instilled and engrained over generations and generations that it has been perceived as the true and real male experience. When in fact, these notions of the dominant masculinity as strong, boys don’t cry, men are winners, sexually hungry have limited our true human experience and thereby limits our capacity to see ourselves beyond this limited small box.

I am reminded that the work that the SAFE Place does with coaches in our university is vital in effecting change by engaging them to be transformative rather than transactional in order to support young men’s healthy masculinity.

More to come…

~Ismael de Guzman

Men Can Stop Violence

breakingupthedisco: Which is more than 50% of the country. This...

Tue, 06 Nov 2012 16:34:49 -0500

breakingupthedisco:

Which is more than 50% of the country. This is injustice and I don’t want to live on this planet anymore.

THIS IS CRAZY!